Is Being Called A Frontline "H.O" A No?

The most illustrious and sorely missed blogger, Prettidolli, first brought awareness of the duty, obligation and serious dedication of what it means to be a Frontline Diva when she wrote the "10 Commandments of Frontline H.O.ism" in the year 2006.

The term "Frontline H.O." was coined by Prettidolli as well, she explained that a "H.O." was the acronym for HIGHMAINTENANCE OVERACHIEVER. Since then Frontline H.O. has become a part of the Carnival vocabulary though I am sure many of you were unaware of what exactly the H.O. stood for.

click to enlarge

It has been recently brought to my attention that some Frontliners do not like being called a H.O., acronym or not and would prefer to be called something else even though a HO should never be confused with a H.O.!

So, my question today is do you take offense with the acronym "Frontline H.O.", should the H.O. be retired from use in reference to the Frontliner and what should it be replaced with?

Trinidad Carnival Diary Presents the Best of The Past

I am taking a walk down memory lane for the Blog Posts over the next few days as many of the new readers of Trinidad Carnival Diary May have missed some of the earlier articles from the days of Pretti Dolli and Hottie Hottie. The days when we all got that this was not about taking ourselves seriously but really the coming together of a diverse group of Mas Lovers who finally had a "voice". By the way Dolli, you are missed! I am going to feature some of the more popular articles, the ones I consider to be the best of that time! Hope you enjoy it.

So, the ode to the archives of this blogs kicks off today starting with The Ten Commandments of Frontline H.O.Ism. 

If you want to see the original post, and comments, just click the underlined link above.

Prettidolli was kind enough to define "H.O." for me a while ago since I was using the term more like "HO" leaving out the periods which changes the meaning to something much less glamorous. Her definition is that a H.O. is a HIGHMAINTENANCE OVERACHIEVER, if you have never heard this used in a sentence such as "I am a front line H.O." you are probably quite lost as to what I am speaking about.

TEN COMMANDMENTS OF FRONTLINE H.O.ism according to Prettidolli:

1. Swear to be the best FRONTLINE H.O., giving the cameras all de H.O., and nothing but de non-stop H.O.. So help yuh Jesus/Krishna/Ram & Sita/(Insert deity here) Represent your band and PLAY YOURSELF to de FULLEST!

2. Do your best to make certain you do not look a hot, sweaty, and ghetto mess! That means makeup and all body embellishments should remain intact. Dis ent de backline yuh know....LOL!

3. Do not neglect your section or your admirers under ANY circumstances! They don't make de H.O. but they damn sure can break de H.O.. Be friendly, smile, chat, and oblige de nice folks who are mesmerized by your divadom and fabulousness. Take photos, lime, flirt, hug up de chirren, socialize, LIVE IT UP! It IS Carnival after all!

4. Bless all man jack in de place with a deadly but posh cheesecutter wine when yuh pelting waist. BLESS DEM WID SWEET WAIST!! Yes, I said p-o-s-h. If yuh want dutty wine, stay in de back with Backline Betty and dem... You should be Helen Keller deaf by Ash Wednesday b/c your crystals made plenty noise going, "WHIP WHAP WHIP WHAP!"

5. Pose and smile in style without twisting up yuh body and skinning yuh blasted teeth like a flipping jack-o-lantern. Is February not Obzokee(sp)October... The ideal pose is for the body to be fairly centered with a natural, non-forced smile without the slightest hint of desperation. A true frontline H.O. knows how to make tweet, tweet luuuuv to the camera.

6. On a more serious note, H.O.'s MUST have their hygiene in tact! This means, removal of all unsightly body hair, no visible underarm deodorant, no halitosis, no lipstick/goop on or in teeth, no poorly positioned pantyliners. Believe me, I have seen this and have gone Helen Keller b-l-i-n-d right on Carnival Tuesday. Why play yuhself frowsy in a $1K mas?Allyuh get meh point...

7. Make certain that your band's security can control yuh property. Make a FRIEND in security, it helps! As an ultra, ubersexy, divalicious F.H.O men (and some women) will attempt to rush your band to get more than just a glimpse of you. And why not? The poor souls simply cannot help themselves! IS YOU GYAL IS YOU! This is where security comes in to keep you safe and bum's rush free. Is not just sweet man...vagrants does tief ah wine too yuh know?(Psst! Security can also babysit your stilettos until it's time to cross de Grand Stage.) Check on it.

8.IGNORE DE FRIGGING CUT-EYE. Let's just face it, many do aspire to H.O., but few do achieve. The hateration screw face and cut-eye is alive and well. Meh granny does say that red costumes does decrease de maljo. The Devil is a liar! Don't hate, congratulate, lift, separate...Two snaps, allll of that.

9. Be a Benz, Beemer, not a Pinto screamer. F.H.O's take pride in themselves. Facials, manicures, yoga, gym classes, discipline, nutrition, and exercise are mandatory. If your love handles are dragging on the floor behind you and there are flats in you Michelin tire, de H.O. is NOT for you...Leff de H.O. alone! (Please see appendix for B.M., aka Bullet hole Mampie.)

10. The best F.H.O's have a heart as magnanimous as their Carnival persona. This means respect your fellow masqueraders and other bands while you are on the road. A cussing, swearing jammette does not a F.H.O make! Do not be a pretender to the throne. I tend to buy extra pieces of inexpensive jewelry to give away to de sweet lil' H.O.'s in training who beg for pieces of your costume. I've even given some of my lunches, snacks, and drinks away to the homeless folks who "try a ting" with these overstocked and overloaded bands on de road. Carnival is a time of joy and giving. Do so act like so!

Where Do We Draw The Line?

Have you noticed that the Bands these days are giving masqueraders more options when it comes to costume choices? With these new options comes with it  the chance for masqueraders to choose a costume according to their budget but it also brings a confusion of sorts on the hierarchy of "lines" when it comes to Frontline, Backline and everything in between. Masqueraders today love spending their money for the extra exclusivity of belonging to the Frontline club, not to mention the extra five minutes of fame afforded frontliners by allowing them to cross the stage first. But  the question has to be asked, is the appeal of the Frontline being undermined with all these choices.. and if we were to do a section hierarchy where does everyone fall in? 

First off we have the regular backline costume, which in some cases is not even "regular" as it comes with the option of a small or large headpiece. If you choose the large headpiece does that make you Backline Plus?

Backline

Backline Plus

Then we have the Frontline costume with the addition of extras like a backpack , wire bra or a much larger and grander headpiece than even the Backline option with the large headpiece. I call these the Frontline Fully Loaded:

Frontline Fully Loaded

But, there is a new category of Frontliners, the one with either a different body wear to the backline or just a bigger headpiece and none of the "extras" that makes you Frontline Fully Loaded, these are the  Frontline Lite: 

Frontline Lite

So, we now have Backline, Backline Plus, Frontline Lite and Frontline Fully Loaded. And if you are playing in YUMA the Backline also has the option of buying a BACPACK  (Taurus,  Oracle) or Collar (Pisces) which is also an option for Frontline and adds a whole new category, is this now the Mid Line? And in the Line Up is the Backline With Back Pack (Mid Line) a step ahead of Frontline Lite? Confused yet?

Personally I think Frontline Fully Loaded is the ONLY way to go if you are playing a TRUE frontline, GO BIG OR STAY HOME is our motto; to me if you are not Frontline Fully Loaded you are just a nicely decked out Backline Betty...sorry. However I know many masqueraders want the drama of the frontline costume without all the extras that they think is too much hassle on the road (blasphemy)! But I think we are reaching comical status now on how many "lines" there are in costuming for women and now  we want to  define exactly what each "costume line" means so masqueraders will know their place when crossing the great and almighty stage because honestly, none of this matters otherwise !

So, is having more choice a good thing or is this just going to cause more confusion and animosity on the road when you can no longer differentiate between the Backline Betty and the Frontline H.O. and everyone  else who paid good money for their costume extras and who want to be FIRST when crossing the stage? What does a Frontline mean to you and really, do you even care? Thoughts, opinions, weigh in! 

Frontline or Buss?

Reading Rene’s review of Spice I could not help but chuckle when she described the other Frontliner in her section as a “Betty” ie Backline Betty. You see for Carnival 2009 there was an unprecedented demand for frontline costumes, being as elaborate and gorgeous as they were in most bands. However it seems as if some of the frontliners forgot to read the 10 Commandments of a Frontline H.O. or we need some new ones!!

Being a frontliner is not for everyone, if you are not ready to commit to it 100% don’t even bother or else you risk being eclipsed by the other frontliners who had their act together. This year I saw too many frontlines who missed the bus or who simply looked busted. So for 2010 if you DO decide to pay all that money for a frontline costume, do it justice and please, wear it well!

1. Frontliners do not do sneakers; boots are the footwear of choice when wearing a frontline costume. Heeled boots are for the TRUE divas, I think I will be testing out wedge heels for 2010 as as much as I love the look and admire the tenacity of the girls playing in heels I just cannot put my feet through that torture. Sneakers are for Backline Betty’s (no offense to the back line babes who were stunning in their boots or sneakers customized to match their costume)



2. When taking up the responsibility of being a frontline you also take up the responsibility of looking impeccable from head to toe that means shelling out extra for proper makeup and having your hair styled to match your headpiece. Weaves, wigs, braids are all acceptable in managing the hair. RAGS on your head are unacceptable!



3. Leave the knapsack behind! I cannot believe how many frontlines I saw lugging around the Goody Bag (knapsack) on the road! First off get a man purse to do that job for you; the only thing in your hands should be a matching mini bag or a pouch. No totes, no sequined hobos; make the purse small and cute, you will be surprised how many essentials can fit in a tiny bag! That knapsack is a big FAT no; it does not even MATCH!

4. Frontliners “glow” we do not sweat, therefore make sure that in your mini pouch are blotting sheets. When you pose for the hundreds of photos you are guaranteed to be asked for, you do not want to be looking as if you just ran a 5k in broiling sun.

5. Frontliners do not do runs! Ick, I absolutely HATE runs in stockings and with the rhinestones on costumes that are now a trend (which I hate) most of us wearing stockings were either shredded by the end of the day or shredded other’s tights. Although I coated all my rhinestones I still managed to snag my tights on my hand band, luckily I walk with EXTRAS as well as clear nail polish. In the event that you do not have extra tights simply dab some clear nail polish on the run to prevent it from shredding. Ideally you can also wear two pairs of tights and just peel off the one that gets damaged. Of course I applaud all the ladies with the perfect legs that went tights-less, I think this is the first time I ever saw that as being a good thing in the face of all those ugly ripped tights.



6. Personalizing your costume is a nice touch, go the extra mile and add body jewelry, body art or even some extra feathers and bling. However there is a fine line between cute and cosquel. If your costume is mainly earth tones why add yellow feathers to it? If you are looking for a contrasting colour to turquoise and brown why fuchsia pink? Customize the costume to make it look better not worse!

7. Plus sized frontliners please represent! Ask for a corset and get it totally blinged out (I saw some gorgeous ones in Spice!) if you are not comfortable doing a bikini. No need to try and squeeze a size 16 into a costume designed for a size 6!



8. Be gracious for photographs and practice your poses BEFORE Carnival so that your best side can be captured. Do not let the backline Betty’s jump in and steal your thunder in photographs.


9. On that note stake your claim in the front of the section when crossing the stage. The Betty’s did not pay extra for the frontline so therefore they should respect your space and stay behind! Kudos to section leaders and security that made sure frontlines got to cross the stage first and in all their glory.

10. And finally wear your costume, and wear it proud! I was so happy this year to see frontline ladies in full costume down to last lap! Headpieces and backpacks still intact, you did well.

The job of a frontline is a tireless one with no glory except for the adulation and constant demand to capture your spectacular beauty by so many adoring spectators. Many have attempted and many have failed to truly embrace the role of a frontline. Those that do it and do it well, realize the totally addicting high one gets from being a Carnival Superstar! And if the frontline is just not for you, no shame in being a backline BABE ..just don’t be a Betty!

H.O. itis is spreading!

Look out, if you have not been inoculated from it the disease of "H.O. itis" is spreading! I have heard there is a phenomenally marked increased of a demand by masqueraders wanting to be a H.O. for Carnival 2008. We have those wanting to be the simple Frontline H.O. and others foaming at the mouth to be an Individual Frontline H.O.!! It is H.O.ness gone mad. The competition for those select, few spots of H.O. fame has just gotten that much fiercer!

Let me just warn all those suffering from this affliction that they first need to read, study and commit to the 10 commandments of Frontline H.O. ism ,written by none other than the number one H.O. Prettidolli, if they are truly to embrace being a H.O. Secondly, know that H.O.ism does not come cheap so though you may be suffering from the ailment of H.O.itis at the moment a sticker shock of the actual price of the costume might very well cure the sickness and relegate the status to Back line betty. Also, all frontline H.O.s should be prepared to have their down payment ready at a moment's notice, the standard $900.00 is for the "common" folk, H.O.s this year are going to be paying more than $1200.00 as a down payment! H.O.s do not balk at the price, H stands for High Maintenance O stands for Overachiever; do not set a budget for your costume.

A side effect of H.O.itis is the two section H.Oism, but note that two sections do not equal one frontline. While it is admirable that many are now exploring the prospect of playing on one costume on Monday and another on Tuesday the true H.O.s are making sure at least one of those costumes is a frontliner!!

And finally if you have H.O.itis and it has not spread to your friends learn the rules and regulations for a solo Carnival superstar which is indeed what a H.O. is!

The Rules & Regulations for a SOLO Carnival Superstar according to Prettidolli:

1. Ignore family members and friends who pledge allegiance to other bands besides the one you plan to register with. This also works for those playing in one section who don't agree with the section you have selected for yourself.

2. Register alone for the most FABULOUS costume that tickles your fancy. Walk into the mas camp with your head held high, dearheart! Hold your CC high above your head and cock back and roll if yuh doing yuh ting online. And TELL DEM TELL DEM TELL DEM yuh want ah THONG honayy! Or any other select adornments.....LOL.

3. Work that bod into shape like ah bandit in the upcoming months prior to de Big Show. Get yourself and your accessories in order. Think sexy. Think scandalous. Think BOOTYLICIOUS! Your body is ah temple. Work it like it's the flipping PARTHENON!

4. After you have picked up your costume in TNT, blow raspberries or flip 'em the bird. You know, those same miscreants who insist you have made the wrong decision by not jumping with THEM...In THEIR band. Or THEIR section.

5. Arrive home, try on yuh mas, blow kisses to the love of your life in the mirror, skin yuh teeth, and then practice yuh jump and wave. Jumpandwavejumpupandwavvve...

6. On the big day, dress up in yuh mas and grab a jar of jelly and hand it to the same miscreants who doubted you. Then as they look at you in strange fashion, SNATCH the jar BACK! Tell 'em "I don't think your READY fo' this JELLY." Give two snaps and walk out the door, chile!

7. Meet up with yuh band, JUMP UP, and DRINK UP, and WINE UP and have yuhself ah time. PLAY YUHSELF! You don't have to worry about a crew, just be like Nike and do YOU. Just don't walk off into any ISOLATED areas ALONE. PLEASE DON'T DO THAT!

8. If you are in any TNT band you are bound to meet the following:

a) At least 10 children bystanding (and wining..LOL.)

b) At least 20 women who want to befriend you just so that you can help them adjust their headpiece, tighten/loosen up their beltpiece, straighten up their hair, center their backpiece, fix up their makeup, untangle their stockings before a run sets in, and tell them whether or not they have lipstick on their teeth. You all may want to pose in front of car windows to make certain allyuh are looking propah. Or someting so. Yuh know how we women stay...

c) At least 200 men who are willing to give their EYETEETH just to be in YOUR GAW-GEE-OUS presence. It is easy to remember this one: For the total number of women you meet, just add a zero to that number and this new number signifies the number of men dazzled by your Carnival presence. If you have extra large breast implants, do feel free to add another zero. If you are a F.H.O., add two more zeros. ;)

d) At least two vagrants who want to tief ah wine..And some of yuh choice libations. Nothing is sexier to a vagrant during Carnival time than a female masquerader....Except ah female masquerader WITH BOOZE! :S If ah scruffy man tells yuh to put yuh hand up in de air, he might not have the Carnival spirit, he just might be trying tuh stick yuh for yuh liquor. Sorry to burst your bubble, but ah lie? Don't make yuh Johnnie (Walker) come lately...

e) At least one grandma or grandpa or old uncle who absolutely MUST tell yuh how HOT they were when they were in their ROYAL. Back in the day. A rhel saga boy or jamette. With government names like Errol, Beulah, Olivene, Clement, Imogene, Savitri, Rooplall, or Everett....

9. The good old DJ truck is always ah choice liming spot where you can meet, greet, and lime anytime! Try ANY truck throughout the ENTIRE band. Pick yuh BESS truck, smile, and wink up at the DJ. They like that. It does make them feel sweet. Rhellll sweeeet. This doesn't work if you have a lazy/crossed eye or questionable dentition. The DJ WON'T appreciate THAT!

10. Go MAD. I does well and skip and chook and prance badly throughout de front, middle, and back of meh bhann. BADDD with ah triple D. I doh study ANYBODY. Folks does watch meh right by mehself like meh head GONE, but meh faculties are very much INTACT! If yuh have time to study someone else, yuh WILL NOT, I repeat, WILL NOT enjoy yuh Carnival. You are
NEVER
EVER
ALONE!
So make meh feel PROUD. You do the SAME!

11. Last, but not least, there is always SECURITY. Some of them like de chatting and de attention and ting. Just make certain they don't get FRESH. :o For example, telling you they want to help yuh adjust yuh thong or brassiere or something positively BIZARRE like that!

Be warned that once you succum to H.O.itis there is no turning back, you shall forever suffer from the desire that only a frontline H.O. costume can suffice.. take it from me!